First dates are filled with excitement, nerves, anticipation, dread, the chance of embarrassment, the promise of memories, and the fear of rejection. All of these feelings can lead to you going into the date with a foggy head at best which adds unneeded stress to an already stressful occasion. Being clear minded and knowing what you’re going into can help to keep you calm, cool, and collected and ready to impress. Here are a few first date tips to help you get started:
Something to Talk About
Be like Bonnie Raitt and give them something to talk about! Although in this case the “them” is “you” and well… yeah. But anyway, at the very least get a feeling for the other person’s interests so you can at least ask the right questions to keep them engaged. Check on their social media profiles if you have access to them and see what kind of communities and interests their engaged with to get a good idea before the date. Or, if you already know some of their hobbies, do a quick Google search about them. You don’t want to be an expert or come across as fake, but taking the time beforehand can help to keep the conversation flowing and who knows, you might end up genuinely interested too!
Put Your Political Activism on the Back Burner
This goes for anything you’re wildly passionate for too. It’s great to be involved in a movement or be wildly interested and engaged with a hobby, but you don’t want to be known for that after the first date. If they’ve done their homework then they probably already have an idea of what interests you so it’s sure to come up, but you don’t have to talk about it in depth for two hours. Plus, if it’s political or theological, it’s better to wait until after the first date to bring up potentially touchy subjects.
More and more people get to know each other online before the first date happens in real life, and unfortunately people lie online. No, I’m not just talking about their age or weight, but their history and background as well. The looking-for-love-forlorn-bachelor could in all honestly be the twice-divorced-ex-convict that you’d never want to meet. With this in mind, an online background check can give you the information you need to stay safe. Some other things to keep in mind are not meeting at a private location or getting into a private vehicle, letting a friend know where and what you’re doing and for how long, and having an “out” in case the date takes a turn for the worse.
First dates are always stressful (for me at least), and even more so if you’ve never met your date in person before. Having some extra information to keep the conversation flowing and knowing when to put the brakes on your own interests can help keep your first date a success. Always remember to think of your safety first as well. Background checks along with other precautions can help to ease your mind, or could have you cancelling the date if something doesn’t feel right.
Image credit: Michael Marcol